It’s been a summer of suitcases and heat. I’m in southern California now – outside of LA in Lancaster where my sister Sarah and her husband Casey live. She and I went running this morning and I could feel dryness plastering the insides of my nose. And I felt severely out of shape . . . I got back from Chicago late Thursday night and left on a road-trip to LA Friday evening with my sister Rachel – on the trek back to college.
Chicago connects with Bulgaria . . . a bit of background:
My friend Tausha, who I met through the grad program at Northwest, is director of the American English Academy in Sofia, Bulgaria – where she’s been teaching for the last seven years and has become intimately acquainted with the founders of the school, Frank and Ruth Munsey.
Frank and Ruth Munsey have spent their lives building God’s Kingdom. Mr. Munsey celebrated his 69th birthday last week – and has a lot to celebrate. He and his wife planted a church in Indiana about 45 minutes outside of Chicago years and years ago. After “retiring” from pasturing, the two moved to Bulgaria 18 years ago. Now, the church they originally planted in Indiana is pastured by their son and his wife. Additionally, there three other children are pastors in LA and Seattle – and their grandson planted a church in downtown Chicago two years ago. The heritage of those who serve the Lord . . .
So, Frank and Ruth were missionaries in Bulgaria sent by UPC (something Pentecostal) – and the school that they opened happened almost by accident. Ruth began teaching some of the local missionary kids in her kitchen. Other missionaries found out about it, and began sending their kids to her. Eventually, the two opened a school – American English Academy – which is now a private international school located in Sofia, Bulgaria. Students from many different nationalities (and religions) now attend the school – about 160 total. The irony is that a few missionaries recently pulled their children out of the school because they realized that Muslim and Jewish children attend the school. (And I thought to myself, “Missionary families are afraid of allowing their children to interact with non-Christians?”) Anyway, the school is economically sustainable and has become a platform for different types of ministry to sprout out of – for example, they are currently working on a project to de-institutionalize orphanages in Bulgaria – and they provide education for the orphans at a local orphanage.
Last week, their grandson Kent who planted the church in downtown Chicago held a conference at his church – he brought in Nic and Kristine Kaine from Hillsong Church in Sydney, Australia. As it happens, this is the same couple that founded the A21 anti-trafficking organization in Thessaloniki, Greece which I visited this summer – and they are wanting to start a partnership with the school in Bulgaria in order to have a long-term restoration center and provide education for victims rescued from trafficking. So, my friend Tausha convinced the Munsey’s to fly me out to Chicago for the meetings concerning the collaboration of these organizations . . .
And now, as it turns out, they are asking me to join them this coming summer in Sofia. They want me to teach at the school and help to develop some kind of educational curriculum for formerly trafficked women. Further, there are women who work on the streets of Sofia – I’ve seen them with my own eyes. And there are no organizations there reaching out to them or serving them incarnationally to share with them the redemption of Jesus. So, they are hoping that I can help them to develop an outreach similar to that of New Horizons and Nea Zoi – where a group of us can meet with these women on the streets and intersect their lives in a way that will prove transformational as they encounter the living Christ. Obviously, ministry would sprout out of that place as we learn how to provide for their needs holistically by collaborating with other organizations and resources in Sofia . . .
It seems that the Lord is opening doors . . . pray for discernment in the coming months as He continues to guide my steps!
Monday, August 17, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Sin, Die in Me!
There are days when I feel like my heart is an egg broken open inside of me - with every word and thought like a fork prodding at the spherical yoke until its membranous covering is broken and it drips down to spread thin and cover over all my organs.
Mynew neighbor Bev said a couple nights ago, "You know, those eggs looks so small and compact until you break them open - and then if they fall on the kitchen floor, you just wouldn't believe how much space they cover! It's like you never really can clean them all the way up."
She's an eccentric lady in her 80's with gray hair and shining eyes who lives in an old house behind a jungle of a front yard. We crossed paths on a hot afternoon; her arms were laden with ripe summer squash that she was carrying down from her garden patch up the street. She calls herself a "tenant farmer" for a man with a big yard up the street - he lets her garden in his yard, she drops off some succulent veggies on his front porch, and they consider it an even exchange. But neither has any idea how much I get out of their trade - watching the bright eyed, smiling woman waltz down the street.
I was carrying a box into the house, going to let her pass by on the narrow sidewalk, and she laughed and said, "You go head . . . I've got all afternoon! I've just got these little squash!"
A few nights later, at a neighborhood block party, she shared with me all about her 10 year back-packing trek through Europe and Asia - she never had a family, because she loved adventure too much. She's happy now, and HILARIOUS . . . but I must admit . . .
There's a black cloud of fear that rises inside of me and chokes at the back of my throat every time I hear a story like that . . . no family? No kids and grand-kids to sit at your knees when you're too tired to garden?
I'm a dreamer. Since before I can remember, I was setting up my castles in the sky and trying to build brick staircases high enough to reach them. But it's only been pretty recently that I've really considered the cost.
Ya, there's the comfort and safety of an American life - there's the beauty of Greenlake and the convenience of a car - there's help for anything always a phone call away - there're more strong churches than I can even visit (and of course, struggling ones mixed in as well) - there're regular jobs and routines and flushing toilets and hot showers - grocery stores everywhere, libraries and banks. I really like my house, my bedroom, my space, my house-mates, and my convenient life. The reality is, I would miss those things.
But I think for me, the scariest thing is relationships that erode over time and distance . . . recognizing that in a foreign place, I will be a foreigner - and close friends will be hard to find. And I don't just want close friends - I want a family.
But I consider Jesus' words in Mark:
Jesus said again, 'Children how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than fora rich man to enter the kingdom of God.'
The disciples were even moer amazed, and said to each other, 'Who then can be saved?'
Jesus looked a them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.'
Peter said to Him, 'We have left everything to follow you!'
'I tell you the truth,' Jesus replied, 'no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields - and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.'
(Mark 10:24-31)
And in Luke 6:24-26 (the part of the Beatitudes that I tend to not focus on as much):
But woe to you who are rich,
for you have already received your comfort.
Woe to you who are well fed now,
for you will go hungry.
Woe to you who laugh now,
for you will mourn and weep.
Woe to you when all men speak well of you,
for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets.
I remember when I was a young teenager, and the Spirit of God revealed Christ to me in a way that changed me forever. I remember at that time, the Gospel burned like fire in my life - and there was nothing that even came close to its worth or magnificence. I remember when I first made a commitment to Jesus that I would go wherever He sent me - that I wanted my life to be about letting other people know Him. And I remember what motivated me - that I wanted to know Him; I wanted to be with Him; I wanted to depend on Him so deep and to trust Him all the time. I wanted to put myself in a place where I was forced to stay at His feet, because even then I understood the pull of sin in my life.
I feel sad that over time, that love has eroded. Jesus, whatever it takes, I want to be with you. I want to love you, to trust you, to obey you and worship you and honor your lordship in me. I want that more than anything, Jesus. I want you to be my closest companion. I want your gospel to burn like fire in me - to come out of me and give hope to other people. I want to be yours alone, Christ, yours alone. Yours alone. Jesus, I pray that whatever it takes, you would keep me in that place - let NOT sin have its way in me. I want You to be my Lord. Only you.
Oswald Chambers writes in My Utmost for His Highest (June 23):
"We look at life through the eyes of reason and say that if a person will control his instincts, and educate himself, he can produce a life that will slowly evolve into the life of God. But as we continue on through life, we find the presence of something which we have not yet taken into account, namely, sin 0 and it upsets all of our thinkign and our plans. Sin has made the foundation of our thinking unpredictable, uncontrollable, and irrational.
"We have to recognice that sin is a fact of life, not just a shortcoming. Sin is blatant mutiny against God, and either sin or God must die in my life. The New Testament brings us right down to this one issue - if sin rules in me, God's life in me will be killed; if God rules in me, sin in me will be killed. There is nothing more fundamental than that. The culmination of sin was the curicifixion of Jesus Christ, and what was true in the history of of God on earth will lso be true in your history and mine - that is, sin will kill the life of God in us."
Jesus, You are my HOPE. I believe in You. I want Your sacrifice to bear fruit in my life. I want Your blood to shoot through my veins - I want to be Your daughter. Grant me the courage, Holy Spirit, to follow Christ. Grant me the courage to be obedient. I love You, God. Amen.
Mynew neighbor Bev said a couple nights ago, "You know, those eggs looks so small and compact until you break them open - and then if they fall on the kitchen floor, you just wouldn't believe how much space they cover! It's like you never really can clean them all the way up."
She's an eccentric lady in her 80's with gray hair and shining eyes who lives in an old house behind a jungle of a front yard. We crossed paths on a hot afternoon; her arms were laden with ripe summer squash that she was carrying down from her garden patch up the street. She calls herself a "tenant farmer" for a man with a big yard up the street - he lets her garden in his yard, she drops off some succulent veggies on his front porch, and they consider it an even exchange. But neither has any idea how much I get out of their trade - watching the bright eyed, smiling woman waltz down the street.
I was carrying a box into the house, going to let her pass by on the narrow sidewalk, and she laughed and said, "You go head . . . I've got all afternoon! I've just got these little squash!"
A few nights later, at a neighborhood block party, she shared with me all about her 10 year back-packing trek through Europe and Asia - she never had a family, because she loved adventure too much. She's happy now, and HILARIOUS . . . but I must admit . . .
There's a black cloud of fear that rises inside of me and chokes at the back of my throat every time I hear a story like that . . . no family? No kids and grand-kids to sit at your knees when you're too tired to garden?
I'm a dreamer. Since before I can remember, I was setting up my castles in the sky and trying to build brick staircases high enough to reach them. But it's only been pretty recently that I've really considered the cost.
Ya, there's the comfort and safety of an American life - there's the beauty of Greenlake and the convenience of a car - there's help for anything always a phone call away - there're more strong churches than I can even visit (and of course, struggling ones mixed in as well) - there're regular jobs and routines and flushing toilets and hot showers - grocery stores everywhere, libraries and banks. I really like my house, my bedroom, my space, my house-mates, and my convenient life. The reality is, I would miss those things.
But I think for me, the scariest thing is relationships that erode over time and distance . . . recognizing that in a foreign place, I will be a foreigner - and close friends will be hard to find. And I don't just want close friends - I want a family.
But I consider Jesus' words in Mark:
Jesus said again, 'Children how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than fora rich man to enter the kingdom of God.'
The disciples were even moer amazed, and said to each other, 'Who then can be saved?'
Jesus looked a them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.'
Peter said to Him, 'We have left everything to follow you!'
'I tell you the truth,' Jesus replied, 'no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields - and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.'
(Mark 10:24-31)
And in Luke 6:24-26 (the part of the Beatitudes that I tend to not focus on as much):
But woe to you who are rich,
for you have already received your comfort.
Woe to you who are well fed now,
for you will go hungry.
Woe to you who laugh now,
for you will mourn and weep.
Woe to you when all men speak well of you,
for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets.
I remember when I was a young teenager, and the Spirit of God revealed Christ to me in a way that changed me forever. I remember at that time, the Gospel burned like fire in my life - and there was nothing that even came close to its worth or magnificence. I remember when I first made a commitment to Jesus that I would go wherever He sent me - that I wanted my life to be about letting other people know Him. And I remember what motivated me - that I wanted to know Him; I wanted to be with Him; I wanted to depend on Him so deep and to trust Him all the time. I wanted to put myself in a place where I was forced to stay at His feet, because even then I understood the pull of sin in my life.
I feel sad that over time, that love has eroded. Jesus, whatever it takes, I want to be with you. I want to love you, to trust you, to obey you and worship you and honor your lordship in me. I want that more than anything, Jesus. I want you to be my closest companion. I want your gospel to burn like fire in me - to come out of me and give hope to other people. I want to be yours alone, Christ, yours alone. Yours alone. Jesus, I pray that whatever it takes, you would keep me in that place - let NOT sin have its way in me. I want You to be my Lord. Only you.
Oswald Chambers writes in My Utmost for His Highest (June 23):
"We look at life through the eyes of reason and say that if a person will control his instincts, and educate himself, he can produce a life that will slowly evolve into the life of God. But as we continue on through life, we find the presence of something which we have not yet taken into account, namely, sin 0 and it upsets all of our thinkign and our plans. Sin has made the foundation of our thinking unpredictable, uncontrollable, and irrational.
"We have to recognice that sin is a fact of life, not just a shortcoming. Sin is blatant mutiny against God, and either sin or God must die in my life. The New Testament brings us right down to this one issue - if sin rules in me, God's life in me will be killed; if God rules in me, sin in me will be killed. There is nothing more fundamental than that. The culmination of sin was the curicifixion of Jesus Christ, and what was true in the history of of God on earth will lso be true in your history and mine - that is, sin will kill the life of God in us."
Jesus, You are my HOPE. I believe in You. I want Your sacrifice to bear fruit in my life. I want Your blood to shoot through my veins - I want to be Your daughter. Grant me the courage, Holy Spirit, to follow Christ. Grant me the courage to be obedient. I love You, God. Amen.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Christ's Love Compels Me . . .
I feel like this is pretty crazy . . .
I can't remember if I wrote that the weekend I was in Sofia, I made contact with an organization in Thessaloniki called A21. This particular organization is funded through Hillsong Church in Australia, and just started up last September. In brief, they currently have a shelter in which they house women who are rescued from trafficking (in other words, testify against their traffickers in court), but they can only hold the women there for up to three weeks. The dream is to start up a long-term restoration and after-care center in Sofia where the women could receive education, counseling, and training before eventually becoming independent members of society. . .
Anyway, I had a job interview with this organization during my time in Thessaloniki (that's why I went to Thessaloniki), and the job interview went well. I interviewed with the Director of Operations there in Greece, and I got to spend the weekend with an absolutely lovely and wonderful Greek family, because the mother of the family is the Shelter Manager for A21 there in Thessaloniki.
As it turns out, the overall Directors of the organization are going to be in Chicago next week to meet with the Pastors of the American English Academy, who are partnering with A21 in their Sofia restoration-center campaign. My friend Tausha happens to be the Director of the school there - so they're flying me out to Chicago next week to meet the A21 Directors and take part in some of the initial planning meetings. I feel so honored - and almost in disbelief . . .
And mostly just excited to see what the Lord does with all of this . . . which doors He opens and which He closes; where He's leading and what He's really up to. I don't know where I'll be a year from now - but I trust His will. I trust that He has a plan for my life - and that, wherever He places me, He will use me to build His Kingdom . . . because He's just that big. And I feel like it's somewhat ironic that this blog is named "Pinning words to dreams," because that's literally how I feel right now . . .
So please, if you read this, pray for my trip next week - I leave Monday morning - that the Lord would guide and direct, and make His way plain before me. I really want to trust Him and live out this crazy Gospel. I've been reading in the book of Acts lately, and I'm newly amazed at how absolutely radical the message of Christ is. I want to live it out in a radical way - because the truth is, if I believe it, it's gotta be radically life-transforming and POWERFUL in me and through me. And if my life isn't radically all about this man Jesus, all that can mean is that I don't really believe in Him . . . because LOOK AT WHAT HE DID!!!!
I was at lunch with a very dear friend today, and she asked me if I want to make my life all about trafficking. I waver when people ask me that . . . I waver with it in my own heart. I know enough of these women, and I've known them long enough, to know that this battle is very dark, very deep, and very big. And yet, now that I've seen the faces - now that I've touched and conversed with real people in real bondage, I feel responsible for the knowledge I've been entrusted with. This battle is my battle - and to forget is to blind my eyes to the atrocities and OFFENSES of this injustice that is in complete opposition to the Word of God. And again, if I believe His Word - then I have to walk it out in dark places. I have to live this battle - Christ's love COMPELS me, because One died for all . . . FOR ALL (2 Cor. 5).
But lurking in my heart, there's another flame that's burning . . . and I'm excited to see which road the Lord leads me on. I know He'll make it clear in time . . . I trust Him completely. To Him belongs all glory and honor and power FOREVER . . . Amen.
I can't remember if I wrote that the weekend I was in Sofia, I made contact with an organization in Thessaloniki called A21. This particular organization is funded through Hillsong Church in Australia, and just started up last September. In brief, they currently have a shelter in which they house women who are rescued from trafficking (in other words, testify against their traffickers in court), but they can only hold the women there for up to three weeks. The dream is to start up a long-term restoration and after-care center in Sofia where the women could receive education, counseling, and training before eventually becoming independent members of society. . .
Anyway, I had a job interview with this organization during my time in Thessaloniki (that's why I went to Thessaloniki), and the job interview went well. I interviewed with the Director of Operations there in Greece, and I got to spend the weekend with an absolutely lovely and wonderful Greek family, because the mother of the family is the Shelter Manager for A21 there in Thessaloniki.
As it turns out, the overall Directors of the organization are going to be in Chicago next week to meet with the Pastors of the American English Academy, who are partnering with A21 in their Sofia restoration-center campaign. My friend Tausha happens to be the Director of the school there - so they're flying me out to Chicago next week to meet the A21 Directors and take part in some of the initial planning meetings. I feel so honored - and almost in disbelief . . .
And mostly just excited to see what the Lord does with all of this . . . which doors He opens and which He closes; where He's leading and what He's really up to. I don't know where I'll be a year from now - but I trust His will. I trust that He has a plan for my life - and that, wherever He places me, He will use me to build His Kingdom . . . because He's just that big. And I feel like it's somewhat ironic that this blog is named "Pinning words to dreams," because that's literally how I feel right now . . .
So please, if you read this, pray for my trip next week - I leave Monday morning - that the Lord would guide and direct, and make His way plain before me. I really want to trust Him and live out this crazy Gospel. I've been reading in the book of Acts lately, and I'm newly amazed at how absolutely radical the message of Christ is. I want to live it out in a radical way - because the truth is, if I believe it, it's gotta be radically life-transforming and POWERFUL in me and through me. And if my life isn't radically all about this man Jesus, all that can mean is that I don't really believe in Him . . . because LOOK AT WHAT HE DID!!!!
I was at lunch with a very dear friend today, and she asked me if I want to make my life all about trafficking. I waver when people ask me that . . . I waver with it in my own heart. I know enough of these women, and I've known them long enough, to know that this battle is very dark, very deep, and very big. And yet, now that I've seen the faces - now that I've touched and conversed with real people in real bondage, I feel responsible for the knowledge I've been entrusted with. This battle is my battle - and to forget is to blind my eyes to the atrocities and OFFENSES of this injustice that is in complete opposition to the Word of God. And again, if I believe His Word - then I have to walk it out in dark places. I have to live this battle - Christ's love COMPELS me, because One died for all . . . FOR ALL (2 Cor. 5).
But lurking in my heart, there's another flame that's burning . . . and I'm excited to see which road the Lord leads me on. I know He'll make it clear in time . . . I trust Him completely. To Him belongs all glory and honor and power FOREVER . . . Amen.
Redemption of a Stinking Bathroom
So, I moved into a house two blocks away from Greenlake with three fabulous house-mates . . . and I love it. I'm right off of Aurora - and driving home through Seattle in the evenings with the sun setting behind the Puget Sound on my left and the skyscrapers silhoutted against the velvet sky on the right makes my heart ache with joy. It's bizarre to be living so close to the track where the women walk - I've seen more than one of our girls already walking in the evenings, so close to my own community. It feels right to be here.
I was reflecting the other day on how strange it is that I love Seattle as deeply as I do. For the first several years I lived here, I remember feeling so preoccupied with Africa that I didn't have a moment to think about my own city - and I started to pray that the Lord would give me compassion for my own people . . . my own city. I feel like maybe He answered that prayer more deeply than I would have liked - because I break for this place, and I love it so much. I loved talking about home when I was in Athens - love thinking about this city - love praying for it and dreaming for it and being a part of God's Kingdom becoming more deeply manifest here . . .
I started going to church at Bethany Community Church; it's walking distance from where I live now - and super involved with the community. Last week, it got up into the 100's here (temperature), so the church opened up the sanctuary and had an air-conditioned family movie night for whomever wanted to come. They've partnered with a school across the street - they started a homeless shelter for women in the area - and they're also involved in work overseas. And they love the Bible - and a lot of the people that I've met from there really seem to believe it, too. Praise the Lord - I need to be around people who believe God's Word is true, and really have a passion to obey it. I want to be more like that. I want to meet with Jesus deeper and live Him out more - I want to be obedient and live righteously; I want to stand for the Gospel and LIVE and BREATH His Words. I want to see Justice and Peace and Righteousness meeting here in my community and being lived out with my people . . . I want to walk in the light of Jesus' truth. . .
So, this house that I moved into with these three other girls in their 20's . . . well, it's pretty old. I totally love my little teeny bedroom . . . I feel like it's very Hannah-esque. And there's a little teeny bathroom next to my bedroom that I share with one of my house-mates. It smells funky. I literally spent hours cleaning it today . . . and I was reflecting on how good it feels to make something that is dirty CLEAN. I remember when I was a kid, vacuuming the basement at our inner-city house in Milwaukee. I used to put dirt in front of the vacuum cleaner because I loved to see it get sucked up . . . There's something so gratifying about changing DIRTY into CLEAN.
I think it's because REDEMPTION is something we were CREATED to REJOICE in . . . I love transformation, and I love to see it happen . . . even when it's as simple as my stinking bathroom. I want that for my city, too . . . I want it for my people. I want it for the girls I work with here - and the ones that are overseas. I want the patience to love them and show them Christ, the One who changes BLACK into WHITE - in my life and in theirs.
I love You, Jesus, for being the God of RECONCILIATION. Take me to You, Lord - I just want to be with You!
I was reflecting the other day on how strange it is that I love Seattle as deeply as I do. For the first several years I lived here, I remember feeling so preoccupied with Africa that I didn't have a moment to think about my own city - and I started to pray that the Lord would give me compassion for my own people . . . my own city. I feel like maybe He answered that prayer more deeply than I would have liked - because I break for this place, and I love it so much. I loved talking about home when I was in Athens - love thinking about this city - love praying for it and dreaming for it and being a part of God's Kingdom becoming more deeply manifest here . . .
I started going to church at Bethany Community Church; it's walking distance from where I live now - and super involved with the community. Last week, it got up into the 100's here (temperature), so the church opened up the sanctuary and had an air-conditioned family movie night for whomever wanted to come. They've partnered with a school across the street - they started a homeless shelter for women in the area - and they're also involved in work overseas. And they love the Bible - and a lot of the people that I've met from there really seem to believe it, too. Praise the Lord - I need to be around people who believe God's Word is true, and really have a passion to obey it. I want to be more like that. I want to meet with Jesus deeper and live Him out more - I want to be obedient and live righteously; I want to stand for the Gospel and LIVE and BREATH His Words. I want to see Justice and Peace and Righteousness meeting here in my community and being lived out with my people . . . I want to walk in the light of Jesus' truth. . .
So, this house that I moved into with these three other girls in their 20's . . . well, it's pretty old. I totally love my little teeny bedroom . . . I feel like it's very Hannah-esque. And there's a little teeny bathroom next to my bedroom that I share with one of my house-mates. It smells funky. I literally spent hours cleaning it today . . . and I was reflecting on how good it feels to make something that is dirty CLEAN. I remember when I was a kid, vacuuming the basement at our inner-city house in Milwaukee. I used to put dirt in front of the vacuum cleaner because I loved to see it get sucked up . . . There's something so gratifying about changing DIRTY into CLEAN.
I think it's because REDEMPTION is something we were CREATED to REJOICE in . . . I love transformation, and I love to see it happen . . . even when it's as simple as my stinking bathroom. I want that for my city, too . . . I want it for my people. I want it for the girls I work with here - and the ones that are overseas. I want the patience to love them and show them Christ, the One who changes BLACK into WHITE - in my life and in theirs.
I love You, Jesus, for being the God of RECONCILIATION. Take me to You, Lord - I just want to be with You!
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